DO YOU FEEL ALONE? SKYPE SOMEONE AND WISH THEM A HAPPY HOLIDAY!

QUOTED AND STOLEN FROM AN UNKNOWN SOURCE!

"When you feel alone like no one cares, read this because it's absolutely true: Every night, someone thinks about you before they go to sleep. At least 15 people in this world love you. The only reason someone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you. There are at least 2 people in this world that would die for you. You mean the world to someone. Someone that you don't even know exists, loves you. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look. Always remember the compliments you've received. Forget the rude remarks. So, if you are a loving person repost this on your status ♥" (via Poxie Marx)

I LOVE the sentiment behind this quote that my friend from Los Angeles, Bryan Rabin, posted the other night on FACEBOOK and I assume he sourced it or stole it from another internet friend named Poxie Marx ( hopefully an internet nom de plume). I call this internet stealing, "quote usurping", but the sentiment is one that anybody can usurp and pass along to others in their internet communities because it has good intentions behind it, not for any kind of monetary gain or self promoting notoriety!

This time of year, millions of people, myself included, can get rather down and melancholy during a time when every other person you greet on the street, or in the billions of shops and retail outlets who'll want to sell you everything and anything to make their holiday quotas and commissions, are saying "Merry Christmas", or "Happy Holidays" either genuinely or disengenuinely. But the fact is, there are millions of people worldwide who do not necassarily like this time of year, simply because we're either broke ( either in spirit or monetarily) and GOD knows there's so much pressure to give, give, give; or because we may not be that terribly close with our families, or we're ill, or we've gone through bad breakups and our love lives have gone down the tubes, or we've lost loved ones or close friends and we just feel bloody ALONE! It's an age old dilemma and we find ourselves falling into the cliched Scrooge syndrome...bahhhh humbug! I can kinda' relate to many of these scenarios! TRULY dear puppies, you have no idea how many of these categories I fall into!

So the concept conveyed behind this "usurped & viraled quote" actually holds quite true; that someone out there truly does in fact LOVE us and thinks about us, even if we don't realize it, or we just don't wish to admit it, again for whichever reasons!

A longtime and dear friend of mine, the legendary hair stylist extraordinaire, Vivienne Mackinder, used to say to me often when I was convalescing at her and her amazing God-sent husband Hassan's lovely home in Riverhead three years back ( when I was recovering from a nearly lethal bout of pneumonia ), "we all have our pity parties from time to time, but we can't allow them to overpower our joy of life". No truer words have been spoken...but it's damn hard not to fall into the abyss of self-pity and self-isolationism, especially during this "happy, skippy time of the year". Well, I know I can easily slip into a "pity party" mode, and really.... who wants to be around "Debbie Downer" or "Morose Montgomery" during the holiday festivities? ( see how I included myself in that? ) Personally, I don't like be surrounded by that sort of curmudgeon, so why on earth would anyone want to be around me? I don't want to bring them down when they're so genuinely happy and gay ( no pun intended, lol ), so I invariably find myself refraining from playing in all the reindeer games, so to speak! But what I try to do, is keep my sense of humor and wit and look as glamorous as possible in this less than stellar time for me! I do so love to see my GENUINE friends, but they seem to be able to see right through me and know this is an unhappy time for me!( I often tend to wear my heart and my feelings on my Hermes sleeves). Yes I am a contradiction in terms, outwardly fabulous, inwardly bruised and hurt! I don't think I'm that special or unique in this respect because I believe there are far more "holiday blues" wretches who feel the same way as I do than we can ever imagine, or more than society cares to acknowledge.

So I occupy myself with parties galore, or I isolate myself and retreat, or I think to myself, maybe I'll volunteer for a soup kitchen and discover just how bad my life really isn't! Novel ideas, but they don't always work on me and I invariably find myself...DEPRESSED! There are billions of people around the globe who are far worse off than I am, and I do have my health back now, (thank GOD) but there's no consolation in knowing that other people are worse off than I am, (I'm not a sadist bloody hell) But in my sometimes shallow world of fabulousity, most people are generally much better off than I am..or so it seems, however, charity should always begin at home, I say! You can only help others, if you are truly happy and at peace with yourself.

However, there is a certain kind of joy in getting back to basics about what this time of year should represent, the joy of life and living! I do so love the simple things, like skating at Wollman Rink in Central Park, like having a hot tottie by the fireplace and singing Christmas carols, (I was a Madrigal singer you know), and seeing the joy in the eyes of children during this time of year.....and I love seeing CLOSE FAMILIES RE-UNITED IN LOVE and families who MAKE PEACE with one another!

I'm not a malevolent sort mind you, benevolence it my cup of tea, but were it that I should have that kind of family of close unity and undieing love...alas but NO I do not! I would love to be able to spend some time with my family, but the estrangement of some 30 odd years has left my heart iced and thaw it I cannot seem to manage. Therapy you might say, but the scars and wounds of this once child bruised are hard to mend....even for this image guru. As I always say, I'm an image guru....not a saint!

To reinforce the point, I do find solace in the simpler things in life, although many who may know me socially or peripherally, know me to be addicted to the finer things of life, but such is my profession, not my natural disposition! That's why certain sentiments touch me so....and why I respond with the passion, or displeasure of a nobleman; temperamental yet vulnerable at the same time and subject to whim and fancy...my whims and someone else's fancy. lol

I did endulge myself recently, I "sat" ( not literally, but figuratively ) on the computer last night and talked in length via Skype with a close friend from LA, DTJB (that's Downtown Julie Brown for all you monogrammed challenged people) and chatted with her after she and her husband Martin had just finished putting up their X-mas tree, which I watched twirling round and round with it's Spartanly white Christmas lights. Julie was sipping a goblet filled with Sandeman's Port in her smartly appointed, spaceship-like digs, which I've aptly named "Casa Diva" in Marina del Rey. I, in comparison, was slothed in my tiny U.E.S ( Upper East Side, York Ave & 75th to be exact ) pied-a-terr studio apartment lounging in my blue gingham Ralph Lauren pajamas, and were enjoying each others visable video presence as we just sat on Skype having a chinwag ( Julie's English expression for chat) for what seemed like hours. Now you must understand, I truly LOVE JULIE, and Martin her hubby, is a wonderful man TOO and they're so HAPPY together after 10 years of marriage. YIPPEE, see I'm HAPPY for my HAPPY FRIENDS, I'm not jealous or covetous of their wonderful marriage and they don't depress me, they encourage and inspire me. I truly envey them, how's that? I can count her as one of my VERY DEAR & LONGTIME, TRUE FRIENDS ( almost 25 years and counting) and she is 3,000 miles away, but not so far that I can't Skype her....so thanks Skype for the convenience and cost prohibitiveness factor of being able to bring close friends closer, even when we're worlds apart!

This is exactly what this posting is about....there is always someone out there who truly loves you, although they may be far away. So get back to the basics and put things into perspective about what's truly important in your life, not things, but people, health and happiness! Hard things to acquire, but when they're real, they can last a lifetime!

When I saw that quote which opened this posting from Bryan Rabin, via Poxie Marx, via the countless other internet "quote usurpers", I instinctively SMILED and said to myself, "HELL YES"! This sentiment is something I WILL definitely BUY into, especially in this overly-saturated, consumerist mentality, materialistic holiday season and I'll viral it along to others; because there ARE many people who do indeed LOVE ME and think about me and who genuinely wish me well...and as well as you too, my dear internet puppies. So reach out and Skype someone, cuz' you're definitely not alone!

And as I keep blogging, don't be lonely, or a miserably depressed curmudgeon, do something nice and kind for someone in need, and the universe will do something nice and kind for you!

Montgomery Frazier "The Image Guru"